Friday, April 29, 2005
Need to let off steam soon...
Yes, yes, we did rent a porn movie. And no, it didn't do much for me. The Fiancé, however, did. 12 times. Mwaha.
I dunno what's the deal, though. Regular man-fucks-woman porn doesn't seem to have any kind of effect on me anymore. Have I left the world of vanilla?
Anyway.
I really came here not to brag about my sheer endless ability to orgasm, but to talk about last night. Sorry. ;)
We played a gig at a local club, together with another band who's pretty much considered H.O.T. in the LA Spanish Rock scene right now. They are out and established, and have a big following. And we didn't like them... mostly for exactly these same reasons.Envy's a bitch.
That is, until we started talking and having fun with them last night.
To make a long story short: their lead singer is a girl. Not an overly attractive girl, but cute enough. Nothing special, really. I don't (didn't) consider myself attracted to her, but as we were all talking, she seemed to get all excited about talking with another female musician in the business (- and believe you me, her excitement is well founded: the LA Spanish Rock Scene is completely male dominated), and she was all smiles and friendly small talk with me. We connected over our heights... something that women below 5'10" will never understand. She happened to be exactly that - 5'10" - just like me... only I was wearing boots that make me about 6'2" tall.
She seemed to admire my "ovaries" to be up there with boots that make me even taller, especially since I am playing right next to someone who doesn't exceed 5'6" by much, with shoes, male and all. She wears nothing but flats on stage, and her overall appearance is hunched forward, with her head worn low between her shoulders.
I have issues with my height, but at least I don't do that.
Anyway. There seems to be this thing about girls our height - when we meet someone like us, we seem to immediately connect and swap stories about the horrible cross we have to bear, lol. With her hunched statue I couldn't quite believe that she was really as tall as me (- and with my boots on that made me pretty much tower over her), so off came my boots - and there she was... right at my eye level. Smiling at me and my height with big brown eyes.
That was the moment when someone decided to take a picture of us, so I put my arm around her and she put hers around me, almost cheek to cheek, posing for the picture... and that was the moment when some sort of electricity flash shot through me and I got all dizzy, feeling her female soft shapes against me, and just her overall female presence so close to me...
...and I am not even attracted to her!
Or at least I wasn't up until that point.
I am just not used to having a female person close to me even on harmless levels - simply because there are almost NO female friends in my life... so some random chick comes and poses with me for a simple foto, and I am all gushing and melting to the floor, overpowered by the sheer presence of WOMAN - whether I am really attracted to her or not.
Of course her friendly attitude and apparent happiness over another girl in another band didn't help this at all.
Way I see it, I am way too charged up with this "closeted" passion and... yes... need. Ever since I have decided to follow up on my latent bisexuality (pretty much ever since I started this blog), the pressure has become higher and higher, and as of yet there has not been an outlet valve to relieve some of it. Only more and more cute girls to tantalize me, who I don't know how to approach, or don't even know if it would be proper to.
Scared to death as I am about this Sunday's L-Word meeting, I think I have resolved to going. I have to change my approach towards things, I have to be proactive. It's not like Jo or any cute derivation thereof will just come knock on my door one day and sweep me off my feet. I have to be out there, and get involved. And Sunday, if nothing else, will be a start in that direction.
I dunno what's the deal, though. Regular man-fucks-woman porn doesn't seem to have any kind of effect on me anymore. Have I left the world of vanilla?
Anyway.
I really came here not to brag about my sheer endless ability to orgasm, but to talk about last night. Sorry. ;)
We played a gig at a local club, together with another band who's pretty much considered H.O.T. in the LA Spanish Rock scene right now. They are out and established, and have a big following. And we didn't like them... mostly for exactly these same reasons.
That is, until we started talking and having fun with them last night.
To make a long story short: their lead singer is a girl. Not an overly attractive girl, but cute enough. Nothing special, really. I don't (didn't) consider myself attracted to her, but as we were all talking, she seemed to get all excited about talking with another female musician in the business (- and believe you me, her excitement is well founded: the LA Spanish Rock Scene is completely male dominated), and she was all smiles and friendly small talk with me. We connected over our heights... something that women below 5'10" will never understand. She happened to be exactly that - 5'10" - just like me... only I was wearing boots that make me about 6'2" tall.
She seemed to admire my "ovaries" to be up there with boots that make me even taller, especially since I am playing right next to someone who doesn't exceed 5'6" by much, with shoes, male and all. She wears nothing but flats on stage, and her overall appearance is hunched forward, with her head worn low between her shoulders.
I have issues with my height, but at least I don't do that.
Anyway. There seems to be this thing about girls our height - when we meet someone like us, we seem to immediately connect and swap stories about the horrible cross we have to bear, lol. With her hunched statue I couldn't quite believe that she was really as tall as me (- and with my boots on that made me pretty much tower over her), so off came my boots - and there she was... right at my eye level. Smiling at me and my height with big brown eyes.
That was the moment when someone decided to take a picture of us, so I put my arm around her and she put hers around me, almost cheek to cheek, posing for the picture... and that was the moment when some sort of electricity flash shot through me and I got all dizzy, feeling her female soft shapes against me, and just her overall female presence so close to me...
...and I am not even attracted to her!
Or at least I wasn't up until that point.
I am just not used to having a female person close to me even on harmless levels - simply because there are almost NO female friends in my life... so some random chick comes and poses with me for a simple foto, and I am all gushing and melting to the floor, overpowered by the sheer presence of WOMAN - whether I am really attracted to her or not.
Of course her friendly attitude and apparent happiness over another girl in another band didn't help this at all.
Way I see it, I am way too charged up with this "closeted" passion and... yes... need. Ever since I have decided to follow up on my latent bisexuality (pretty much ever since I started this blog), the pressure has become higher and higher, and as of yet there has not been an outlet valve to relieve some of it. Only more and more cute girls to tantalize me, who I don't know how to approach, or don't even know if it would be proper to.
Scared to death as I am about this Sunday's L-Word meeting, I think I have resolved to going. I have to change my approach towards things, I have to be proactive. It's not like Jo or any cute derivation thereof will just come knock on my door one day and sweep me off my feet. I have to be out there, and get involved. And Sunday, if nothing else, will be a start in that direction.
