After the rather disappointing review I got about the rambles over on my "real blog" a couple of years ago, The Weblog Review and I are friends again. Here is why:

The first thing that I noticed as I arrived to The Other blog was the layout. Usually, it's not the first thing I notice, and if it is, that's bad. This blog was quite the contrary. Just on the basis of the warm brown hues of the background, I was compelled to read more. That's when I looked at the header. "The Other Blog: ...of coming to terms and coming out." This, of course, could only mean one thing, and I was interested. Having several gay and lesbian friends, and being bisexual myself, I knew right away that this was a blog that was going to interest me.

As I read the sidebar (first, as is my habit when I visit blogs: read the static content before the transitional), I learned some things about the author. She's 26, bisexual, and lives in Europe with her fiance and two cats. She's mostly in the closet still, which is why this is "The Other Blog" and not "The Main Blog". I know that some of the people close to me would probably be a little awkward if they knew my situation, so I can relate to what she's dealing with. The sidebar directs me to read the older posts, and as I do, I realize more and more how much I can relate with her blog. Post after post, sounding incredibly familiar and understandable. I'm hooked.

The content is deep. The posts are long and plentiful, and quite descript. She assigns nicknames to the people involved in her story as it churns, as to protect their anonymity. (The explanation of each person is explained in her sidebar.) Brilliantly detailed and drawn together quite well, I felt myself getting fully attached to many of the posts.

Overall, this is a very good blog. I wouldn't suggest everyone read it, because I know there are several close-minded people in the world who look down on this sort of "decision", but for anyone who is wise enough to look past the normal and see into an area that often goes unexplored (for fear of ridicule), this blog is an absolute must. If you're against bisexuality you're obviously not going to like it, since that's the whole point of the blog. I myself will most likely be making several return visits.

My thanks to babz for her kind words. It is not like I am writing this blog to find some sort of "official" recognition, but now that I got it, it does make me feel somehow acknowledged. I find it satisfying to see that other people can connect with what I am writing, and maybe through this review I will gain some more regular readers here - simply to reach more people that may be in similar situations as me. I feel like there is not enough presence of bisexuals and our issues on the web (- not in comparison to gays and lesbians, anyway), and the more of us come together on the web, the better.

About TWR's opinion on this in comparison to their opinion on my "real blog", which got rated more than averagely and with a lot of lacking enthusiasm: I guess it makes a difference and raises my literal competence when I actually have something of interest to talk about, vs. just rambling on about daily events of rather secondary importance.

And speaking of importance. The URL change? (Subtle, huh.) Let's just say I was found and read by someone I seriously didn't want to be found and read by, and while the thought of him knowing all about our bisexuality doesn't bother me at all, his potential presence here still inhibits me in my freedom to write about everything and anything that comes to my head. Let's just see how long this URL will last in its secrecy toward people I know personally and do not want to know about this in too much detail. It is ironic, really, to think that the internet is the most anonymous media out there, yet I am not able to keep my presence in it (and most of all my location) covert.

And still on the subject of importance... The Fiancé and I are scheduled for a double date tomorrow. I have used the internet once again to get in touch with a bisexual girl, and we've been emailing back and forth for about a week now. She is funny with exactly my kind of humor, and from writing I think we have quite a few things in common: for instants a boyfriend. It is refreshing to talk with someone who is in more or less the same situation as me, and wants more or less the same things out of this that I do. We have exchanged phone numbers now, sent a couple of text messages even (- not talked yet though: I missed her first call because I couldn't find my cell in the chaos of my purse quickly enough when it rang), and for tomorrow she asked if The Fiancé and I wanted to go out for dinner with her and her boyfriend.

I liked that a) she asked, and b) that she included her and my partners into this.

Of course, the Amy desaster is still in the back of my head. Emailing was all fun and nice and dandy, and so was talking on the phone, but all the chemistry was lost on her part the second we met for the first time. And instead of telling me, she just wasn't available for contact anymore after that, making me feel like a stalking idiot for all my unanswered emails and text messages.

I am nervous about something like this happening again... but she assured me that - if all chemistry fails - friendship is more crucial than all physical attraction. Another point on her scoreboard, most definitely. If anything, I am looking forward to meeting new people in this old home of mine, which has gotten so stale to me over the years. The Fiancé seems reasonably excited too. An opportunity for potential new friends should never be let slip unattended.

Wow, has it been almost 2 months already?

As you can probably imagine, my life has been hectically crazy ever since our move, filled with acclimatisations, readjustments, introductions, re-acquaintances, catching-ups, job searches. To go into detail on all of these things would be tedious and most likely boring for you, dear reader, so I'll leave it at the following:

The Fiancé and I now live in a small apartment in the city, one that took some energy and effort to make comfortable and cozy, but is now starting to be something I really refer to as "home". The first couple of weeks were a bit rough between him and I once his first relocation shock was over and the readjustment period began, along with some changes and shiftings of the roles him and I have assumed during the last two years of our relationship.

Despite the incredibly bad job situation currently here in my country, I managed to find a job the third week after I really started to look for one, and luckily for me it is something I truly enjoy doing – the exact thing I went to college for, and which I was hoping to do one day. I work in a small graphic design/foto studio, small meaning: it's the boss and me and nobody else, where I am alone in the office most of the time, backing up the boss when he is out on tour all across the country with his photograph slideshows. In other words, I went from "wifey" to main provider for two people – just like that. Imagine the adjustments necessary in my own head.

Mostly due to the incredible amounts of overtime I currently have to put in, and also because payday won't be before October 1st (– and so despite my insane hours at work I am still depending on my parents), we are quite limited in the things we can do, so I can also report no news on the bi-front. I considered coming out to my best friend K, but I didn't get very much past "I have smoked weed before, and guess what – I love it, and do it regularly". K has never been drunk, never ever tried a puff of smoke of anything – and the look on her face made me realize that maybe change needs to be revealed in small doses. Next time I will tell her that I have recently been known to get senselessly drunk to the point of memory lapses, maybe? Bisexuality can wait. It just surprises me to see how coming back to my old home makes me fall back into so many old patterns again automatically – worrying about what people will think or say about me being just one of them.

As a mental note to myself... I need to take care that I will always carry the "dude" inside me, no matter where I am, or by who I am surrounded.

I have also met with two people, a guitarist and a keyboarder, who are looking for a bass player and a drummer. I jammed with them for a bit, and it was some decent entertainment for myself, but it made all my carefully suppressed thoughts and memories of my band and of what could have been come back at me with a vengeance. I parted from these two guys and left my phone number with them in case they would need me for a show, but didn't explicitly offer any more of my time. Now Mr. E is here as well... having come after my sister... and I will have to look and see if he would want to play with me again, maybe start something together. I also contacted a relative of mine, my cousin who put the thought of learning to play the guitar into my head 11 years ago, back in high school which we both went to. He has since developed some mean guitar skills, and has been playing in bands pretty much ever since he knew how to hold a guitar the right way. To my surprise he actually got back to me, after almost a decade of barely any contact, suggesting we should meet, and maybe I would be interested in founding a Metallica cover band with him, for shits and giggles.

So you see... this is not my beloved Los Angeles, and I am homesick for it to the point of frequent tears, but things are not looking bad, right now. Once October comes, I will be financially stable, if not well, for the first time ever since I headed for the USA three and a half years ago, and this prospect makes me feel so much more of a valuable and respectable member of society. I am not wasting time anymore – at least this is my take on it, to avoid too many melancholy and sad thoughts about Los Angeles.

I will update this blog more frequently and regularly now that things have calmed down a little – though I am considering yet another change of URL. If I choose to do so, I will keep those of you interested in the loop of things, certainly. I will also get back to reading YOUR blogs now that I am around again. I hope all of you have been and are well.